Have you ever noticed how self-important this city’s inhabitants are. Their worldview is so London-centric that for many people London = England. There is nothing else to it.

When the man on the telly talks about the House of Commons, he’s only talking about that building just across the river. When he talks about A-list celebrities gracing our shores from half-way across the world, it’s just there – in Leicester Square – not an obscure and abstract location somewhere else in the country. When he talks about protests and riots you can hear them from your office window – not on the radio. There’s such an air of self-importance that if someone were to point out that last year’s riots actually occurred right across the country, you probably wouldn’t be surprised to hear a city-type remark “yeah, well we started it”.

With all that going on on their doorstep it’s not surprising that they feel like the rest of the country follows their lead.

But sometimes, alright a lot of the time, some of this city’s inhabitants need a serious whack around the face. Stop feeling so self-important, and unique, and trendy – you pretentious gaggle of arse-trumpets.

When I read this in, wait a minute, what shitty glossy free magazine was it – well I can’t find it now, and anyway I’m digressing – when I saw this, it made me so bloody annoyed I… well I… went on about it to everyone around me for the rest of the day.

A slashie?!! What a load of crap.

There are people all over the country working two, three or even more jobs, just to bring in some extra money. There are single mums, husbands, brothers, and teenagers all across the country, walking through shit weather to get from one job to another; cleaning offices, toilets, working in shops, picking up rubbish – all to raise that extra bit of money because they don’t earn enough from the first.

It’s not a new and interesting social trend which highlights something about our changing social habits. A perspicacious epiphany giving insight into modern patterns of work and behaviour. It’s self-aggrandising pat-on-the-back crap, that’s peddled by this magazine and others like it to construct an image of themselves and their readers as young, and trendy, and thrusting – dynamic and daring – living modern lives filled with high-octane nights out, crazy sleeping patterns, paninis, flat whites and wasabi peas. It’s the epitome of the modern boast of being “busy”.

Sheila in Barnsley – you know Sheila – the one who works at Gregg’s in the day but moonlights as a cleaner/barmaid/factory worker in the evening – she’s not dynamic. She’s not trendy. She’s a bloody single mum with a penchant for pasties. Offer Sheila a panini and some wasabi peas and she’ll tell you to go fuck yourself.

The realisation that some people have two jobs is not an astounding new find published by esteemed sociologists – but a vacuous and meaningless load of pap that’s made the front page because this keen editor is proud at having coined a new term.

Piss off London. Piss off ES magazine.